Wednesday, December 16, 2009

It's the 4DK Animalympics! Round 14



Ramu from Haathi Mere Saathi

Skill Set: General weepiness, cat wrassling, causing Rajesh Khanna to set himself on fire in order to make ends meet due his high feeding cost.

In case you were wondering, the three main events in the Animalympics are ass-kicking, hell-raising, and shit-disturbing. We're basically looking for animals that manage to be two-fisted even without, in most cases, the benefit of actual fists. This makes Ramu and his other elephant friends from Haathi Mere Saathi a bit of an odd choice, because they're a fairly kindly lot, more about teaching their audience a lesson about friendship and brotherhood than anything else. YAWN! However, Ramu is also a friend to all children -- like Gamera! -- which, in the critter-rich wilds of India, necessitates that he occasionally defensively stomp on a cobra or fling a leopard around with his trunk. In addition to that, he is a misunderstood hero -- like James Dean! -- which means that people think he's much more of a badass than he actually is. This all happily combines to allow us to include him here. I also have to warily tip my hat to Ramu for being the inspiration for some of the most harrowing depictions of child peril that I've ever seen in a Bollywood movie -- which is quite a statement given the industry's amply demonstrated willingness to go there for the sake of wringing an emotional response out of its audience. The worst of these is when crazy Tanuja has a vision of Ramu stomping on her infant son. In sum, it serves as a sobering reminder that it's all fun and games until somebody gets their head crushed.

[NOTE; The 4DK Animalympics will be taking a vacation for the next couple of weeks, but will be back with more violent animal awesomeness after the holidays.]

11 comments:

sunil said...

Does the verbally vouched for brother of Tiger(Amitabh's character) in Khoon Pasina qualify? He doesn't do much expect get released from a cage while a fair is going on and wrestle with Amitabh, causing animal welfare boards the world over to weep, but still causing himself some anxious moments has to count. :)

memsaab said...

I have seen two films now containing the same tiger vs. a boa constrictor footage. It's truly unbearable for me to watch (the boa wins, I think, although I have so far been spared the bitter bitter end of it).

Happy holidays, Todd, and salutations on this great public service called the 4DK Animalympics.

Beth said...

Oooh, now I am very keen to open this DVD and watch a leopard get swung around by an elephant! It's a stuffed leopard, right? Don't tell me.

Sunil, I love the Khoon Pasina tiger! Todd, I have pictures if you want.

Todd said...

Sunil, Beth: Hmmm, I'll have to consider it. Of course, it really boils down to whether I want to watch Khoon Pasina again. I remember the fight, but could the tiger really be said to be a character in the film?

Memsaab: You know, I've seen that footage recently, too, but I can't remember where. Perhaps in Tarzan and King Kong? It is pretty nasty - definitely no stuffed animals involved there.

sunil said...

Fair enough, but if I remember correctly, (and this is hazy childhood memory speaking), you are underselling Ramu. He does a pretty impressive prayer to cure the kid doesn't he?

Todd said...

Yes! There's a scene where all of the elephants go and leave offerings at a shrine to Ganesh, which was awesome. But Animalympics-wise, it still can't compare to Aruna Irani's dog shooting Shetty or that damn dog from Hunterwali charging to the rescue on horseback. Not that I would expect the film to feature an elephant riding on horseback, mind you.

prof. grewbeard said...

hey, i've actually seen this one! i wonder if i'll get my elephant for Christmas this year?...

sunil said...

(wiping tears) ah, the memories. Elephants riding horses? How about a team of snakes driving a car? One for the steering, one to press the accelerator, another to shift gears. Alas! the movie was not appreciated by the philistine public and its name never entered my consciousness.

Todd said...

Prof: So am I the only one who'd never heard of this movie until very recently? (Thanks, Sunil.) Seems like you all have either seen it or at least knew about it.

Sunil: Wait. What? Is that a real movie? Snakes driving a car?! My god. Clearly I have not even scratched the surface.

sunil said...

Aruna Irani! Amrish Puri! Jackie Shroff! Slithering snakes!

http://www.thehotspotonline.com/moviespot/bolly/reviews/d/DoodhKarz.htm

Todd said...

I die.